Casey VS. Texas, The Final Chapter... Pew Pew, Pew Pew

A birthday haiku for you:

Hot vampire* lasers

Shit, those can't wrangle Texas

Blood loss is a bitch

Happy Birthday Casey With Laser Eyes!

XOXOXO from the Casey With Laser Eyes, Pew Pew Team!**

*Fucking English. Vampire is both 2 AND 3 syllables, apparently?

**Stephanie has truly outdone herself this time. Mindy, as usual, waited until the last minute...

Superkids... pew pew, pew pew

Justin Beiber!

Taco Bell Burritos!

Rhinestone Cowboy!

Superstars!

Naked Babies!

The only thing missing are some damn humping unicorns...

KABLAM... pew pew, pew pew

Slapsgiving came to Chez Kembrey this year.

ALT + DRAG... pew pew, pew pew

Who fucking let Sophia pew pew?!?!

A Big Hat for an Even Bigger Brain... pew pew, pew pew

Casey, sensing Jamie's undoubtedly nefarious plan to invade her nose (and any other orifice, for that matter) quickly trains her lasers on his gigantic, um, BRAIN.

I'll Get Those For You... pew pew, pew pew

It's a typical No Shower Saturday for Casey and Mindy...

Casey Goes Postal... pew pew, pew pew

Angry at the current state of political discourse in the Land of the Free, Casey points her laser beams straight at the heart of Texas. Thankfully, her beloved Chik-Fil-A was saved.